I Am Your Unicorn
originally published dec 8 2021
Often sought for, rarely found, unicorns occupy a unique place in history and mythology. Many cultures thought they were real for a time, and their mystical reputation conjured images and tales of all sorts. Some believed they could only be captured by virgins!
These days, “unicorn” is often in reference to something (or rather, someone) equally difficult to find: a suitable third for a threesome. Why is it so hard? Where are all the hot chicks who want to bang me and my hot wife? Why isn’t it appropriate to petition random lesbians on dating apps to join us?
Look, I get it. Who doesn’t want to try out group sex at some point? As one ex said to me a long time ago, “It’s every man’s fantasy, I would be a fool to say no.” In that relationship, it was I who was the eager beaver hunting for a mystical unicorn to join us. He was a bit more tame, while I ached to watch him and some cutie get it on (and maybe I’d get a turn, too).
The trouble is, the reputation of unicorns being rare is a strong one because it’s true. What motivation does a single young woman have for joining an established couple, especially if she’s on dating apps to find herself a mate? It doesn’t seem very alluring to be told that you can come play but then you have to leave. Often, couples on dating apps are looking to fulfill their own fantasy, with little regard for what the unicorn wants.
Fortunately, there are other options besides looking to strangers on dating apps. After all, the dating world is scary and unpredictable. Even if you found someone willing through a dating app or picked someone up at a bar, there’s no telling if you can trust them to respect the boundaries of the existing relationship. A lot of drama can occur when you invite a stranger into your boudoir if the consent and boundaries aren’t made clear first. And even if they are clear, human emotions are volatile, erratic, and unpredictable. What if everyone is all cool in the beginning, but afterwards someone catches feelings and it gets messy? That’s where hiring a professional comes in.
With the boundaries of a professional fun-maker, you have so much more freedom to explore and get creative. Gone is the anxiety about how to find one; there are plenty of advertising sites for that. Gone is the fear that the third party will catch feelings, or feel left out, or secretly try to undermine the relationship. Gone is the worry that you’ll have to do some emotional aftercare following the meeting.
With a companion, you have someone who is there specifically to fulfill your fantasy. You don’t have to worry about my fantasies, my expectations, my needs. My one and only objective is for you to relax and have fun, to be seen and cared for and to feel really, really good. It’s a bonus that I happen to be very bisexual and very into group dynamics in my personal life, as well, so I’m just as excited for our date as you both are. I also love getting to be a guide for newbies – I’ve played the part of Corrupting Temptress many times, all with fantastic results.
The only thing left to do is book me and see for yourself. I can’t wait to be your unicorn.
Need more convincing? Check out this testimonial from a couple:
“Hi Simone, just wanted to say thank you for a wonderful experience. You created a friendly, safe environment that allowed us to explore something new in a fun, organic way. It was a pleasure (in many ways).”
And that was from the wife! Imagine the smile on my face when I read such a sweet note from such a smoking babe. Honestly, I love my life. I can’t wait to get into some mischief with you and yours sometime soon.